THE SECOND PILLAR OF SUCCESS: POSITIVE PERSONAL INTEGRITY

Recently I saw Leonardo DiCaprio on the Oprah Winfrey
show. He was plugging his new movie, but he also told a
story about his grandmother, describing her as "old
school," a woman who told it as she saw it.
He described a private tour of the Pablo Picasso museum,
personally guided by Picasso's grandson. As they looked at
the paintings, it was obvious his grandmother didn't
approve of Picasso's style and when the grandson asked what
she thought, she told him! Everyone in the audience laughed
at the story, but then Leonardo added the real punch-line:
Later he received a letter from Picasso's grandson saying
how much he loved the old woman's honesty and integrity!
Everyone wants to be told the truth. We recognize
integrity, and we also sense the lack of it.
Here's another great story, variously credited to both
Winston Churchill and George Bernard Shaw. It seems one of
them was seated next to a wealthy, aristocratic woman at a
formal dinner. During the dinner, a slightly inebriated
Churchill (or Shaw) turned to the woman and asked if she'd
sleep with him for a million pounds. After recovering from
her outrage, it's said the woman pondered the question and
reluctantly agreed that for a million pounds she would do it.
Churchill then asked if she'd sleep with him for five
pounds, to which she angrily replied, "Certainly not! What
kind of woman do you think I am?!" Churchill's answer is
classic: "That, my dear woman, has already been
established. Now we are haggling over the price."
Personal integrity is priceless and essential to greatness.
Last week we looked at the Pillar of Positive Personal
Passion. It's the reservoir of energy and drive that high
achievers use to reach their goals. They have a personal
belief and passion to achieve their purposes!
The second pillar is an absolute, relentless sense of
Positive Personal Integrity. Unusual Self-Awareness tells
them exactly who they are, and their sense of Positive
Personal Integrity keeps them focused straight ahead. With
high achievers, what you see is exactly what you get. They
are who they seem to be, they know their values, and they
stick to them.
I think of John F. Kennedy's remarkable book, "Profiles in
Courage," and the impact those models had on his own life.
Kennedy can be faulted for many things, but as Robert
Dallek's new biography makes clear, Kennedy new who he was
and through his pain and limitations, he stuck to his priorities.
The great golfer, Bobby Jones, was once complimented for
calling a penalty stroke on himself when no one else was
around to see. He was disgusted by the compliment and
replied, "You might as well compliment a man for not
robbing a bank!"
Lots of people can achieve some level of fame or wealth, or
even political power, without Positive Personal Integrity,
but it won't last. It's not truly satisfying or fulfilling
because at some level, they know they are being false.
True success is built on a foundation of Self-Awareness and
stands on the pillars of Personal Passion and Positive
Personal Integrity. Don't leave home without it!

TAKE ACTION TO GET OUT OF DEBT

Consumer debt stands at $3.898 trillion in May 2018. Households have incurred more

debt than at any time in history. Sadly, financial institutions

continue to encourage easy credit. It's time to take responsibility for your

debt and take action to get out of debt.

Commit to a budget. Know where and how you are spending money. Start by

recording all expenses and retaining all receipts for three months.

Avoid future debt. Say no to new purchases. Avoid impulse buying. Don't

even go to stores, especially malls. Throw away catalogs. Don't buy now

and pay later. Eighty-six percent of those Americans who have

voluntarily cut back their consumption say they are happier as a

result.

Pay off debt systematically. Make a plan and stick to it. First, list

all debts in order, from the smallest to the largest. Second, pay at

least the minimum payment on each debt each month. Third, double

payments on the debt at the top of the list whenever possible. Fourth,

as each debt is paid off, apply that payment plus the minimum payment

toward the next debt.

Dispose off credit cards. Cut them up. Have a ceremony and burn them in

the fireplace. Don't try to modify credit card habits -- quit cold

turkey.

Develop an accountability network. Find another person or group and

discuss expenditures at least once a week.

Make spending need-based. Most purchases are desire-based,

interest-based, pleasure-based, or cash-flow based. Just because you

get a raise or a hefty tax refund is no reason to increase spending. To

determine if it is a need, don't buy on first impulse. Wait. Think about

it for a day or week. Pray about it. If it is a clear need, there will be

no ambiguity.

Develop self-sufficiency. Learn to change your own oil. Grow some of

your own food. Sew some of your own clothes. Learn to cut hair.

Integrate lifestyle simplicity and contentment. If you are content with

the things God freely gives you, expecting little and rejoicing in

whatever comes your way, debt loses its fangs.

Move down. Consider moving to a smaller home, or a cheaper car, and

live a simpler life.

Let appliances die in your arms. Wait until it's dead before you

replace it.

Stop venerating automobiles. Learn to see cars as transportation, not

status symbols.

Simplify your meals; eat out less. Discipline your taste buds to accept

simplicity and healthful foods. Your wallet and your body will thank

you. Eat at home.

Shop for good deals. Decide not to pay full price unless necessary.

Shop thrift stores and garage sales.

Simplify Christmas and birthdays. Begin now to notify extended family

of your decision to cut back on gifts. Make gifts or choose more modest or

fewer gifts.

Enjoy free activities. Use your library for books, magazines, and

videos. Read instead of going to the movies or shopping. Work on a

hobby. Take a walk.

Use debt as an opportunity for growth. If debt has beaten you down, why

not learn from the experience?

Change your measuring stick. Money is not the measure of all things.

Remember, you live in a society, not an economy.

THE FIRST PILLAR OF SUCCESS: POSITIVE PASSION

This is the second in a series of IMPACT on the "building
blocks" that high achievers use to achieve their goals.
After studying highly effective people for over 30 years,
ranging from wealthy entrepreneurs to creative artists, to
great parents, ministers, teachers and salespeople, I've
tried to identify the key "building blocks" they have in
common.
I am convinced that building a great life is NOT an
accident. It is not a matter of luck or coincidence or
genetic gifts. Of course, those things play a role. If your
dream is to be a world-class athlete, it probably helps to
be strong and quick and agile!
No one disputes that, but the mystery is how so many
people with apparent "lucky genes" falter and fail in life,
while others who were never voted "most likely to succeed"
go on to great achievement. How does that happen?
The answer, of course, is that there are specific,
measurable skills to success in life. And they can be
learned!
Last week I pointed out that the "foundation" for a great
life is Unusual Self-Awareness. Highly effective people
know who they are and build lives that reflect their
interests, abilities, talents and values. The failures in
life, no matter how much money or power they accumulate,
are always trying to be "someone else."
Perhaps the most glaring example of failure in all of
history was a guy named Judas Iscariot. He figured out how
to get the money - he betrayed his teacher - and he got the
money. He got 30 pieces of silver and all it cost him was a
self-hatred that caused him to throw the money away and go
hang himself. Getting the money did not equal success!
"First, know thyself." It all starts with a foundation of
Self-Awareness. You don't want to spend your life only to
find out at the end that you "blew it." Walk in the
direction you really want to go!
And go with Passion!
Passion has many names. Some people call it a sense of
mission or purpose. Some have a sense of God's calling,
while others have a vision that keeps them focused through
the years.
I am convinced that all high achievers have a sense of
Passion about what they can accomplish in life. Some
describe it elegantly and precisely, while others seem
muddled and may even claim they "never think about it." But
it's there, nevertheless.
We are goal-seeking creatures. From childhood we have
dreams and we are determined to walk and talk, to master
games, and go to school. Later, we learn to drive, to date,
to play sports or music. Throughout history, we have
wondered what lay over the horizon, out of sight and
calling to us. We are an exploring, curious people, and
that is the basis for Positive Passion.
Now, it's important to note that some people are driven by
negative passions. In extreme cases, they are driven by
hate or fear, but more often they are driven by less
dramatic, everyday passions for sex or money or
irresponsible power. Many addictions are merely passion
focused on gambling or drugs, for instance. I don't know
that those things are necessarily "wrong", but the results
are often disastrous.
The winners in life are pulled forward by a Positive
Passion for what's possible. They have a dream of raising
great kids or building a great business. They imagine
writing a great symphony or preserving a rain forest. They
have a Positive Passion that fires their imagination, that
gets them up in the morning, a Positive Passion that renews
their hope, and pulls them forward.
Out of knowing who you are and what you want (Self-
Awareness) comes a Positive Passion to make a difference.
Find something that excites you, something that scares you
a bit because it's so big and challenging and wonderful,
then trust your Positive Passion to make it happen. That's
what winners do.

SLOW DOWN TO GET MORE DONE!

One of the great keys to high achievement is the ability to
focus. Most of us are capable of extraordinary things when
we focus our time, effort, talent and skills to achieve a
desired goal.
One of my favorite examples is the remarkable ability
teenagers have to spend time on the phone with their
friends. No matter how hard parents try to get them to do
their homework first, no matter how many other things
"distract" them, kids have a super-natural ability to find
a phone and connect with their friends. They know what they
want and they find a way - despite all the "obstacles" laid
down by parents and circumstances - to get it done.
If only we adults had that ability!
As a coach, I am frequently asked "how can I get more
done?" Clients and friends ask about the "secret" to being
more productive and then they tell me about all the
distractions, errands, interruptions and demands on their
time. They say they "can't" focus because of phone calls or
emails, because of running errands or the pressures of work.
Sound familiar?
Of course it does! We lead busy lives. We live in a world
of interruptions!
And so most of the time my answer to the people who ask
about becoming more productive is that, "I see no hope."
That is often a shock to them. It gets their attention and
we can begin having a discussion about what it DOES take to
focus our time and get stuff done.

Here are a couple of suggestions:

1. All cures begin with an accurate diagnosis, or as
Albert Einstein observed, few problems can be solved by the
kind of thinking that created them in the first place.
Too often our attempts at "time management" or "better
scheduling" remind me of "re-arranging deck chairs on the
Titanic." If life is too busy, start by asking who made it
that way - and consider a long look in the mirror.

2. Accept that most of our "have-to's" are actually
optional. Yes, it is nice to have lots of friends and lots
of activities, but it comes at a price. Very few things in
life are truly "necessary."
What are your most important priorities? List them, and if
your list has more than 4-5 items on it, ask yourself if
that really makes sense. Most of us can't handle a dozen
"priorities" and some things really are more important than
others. Less important things may have to go.

3. At all costs, slow down. Remember the old saying that
"when you find yourself in a hole, the least you can do is
stop digging!" Abraham Lincoln is supposed to have said
that, "If I had 8 hours to chop down a tree, I would spend
the first 7 hours sharpening my axe," and that's a great
metaphor for PLANNING!

High achievers make their goals into a lifestyle. They
create a "way of life" that is built around their most
important values, their highest priorities. They live the
life they truly want, starting TODAY. They don't promise
that "someday" they'll slow down or write a book or take a
vacation. They pause and plan and create a life that
reflects their greatest desires and they do it TODAY.

THE FOUNDATION AND THE FOUR PILLARS OF SUCCESS

My people often want the "secret" of success. They want to know how to
build the life they truly want, the one they imagine and
long for, and I compare it to the ingredients of a recipe,
or the tools in a toolbox. The key ingredients are already
familiar to most of us.
For the next few weeks, we will all be distracted with
holidays and end-of-year projects. I hope you'll make
an exception for IMPACT because for the next 5 weeks I want
to address "The Foundation and the Four Pillars Of
Success." These articles may become the basis for my next
book, and I hope you'll make a point to watch for and read
IMPACT from now through December. Here we go:
In a word, the foundation for all extraordinary achievement
is this:
Top Achievers Have Extreme Self-Awareness.

1. Top Achievers are Unusually Selfish
They know themselves and their values. They know what they
want, where they are going and what they will DO with their
lives. They have taken time to "get over" themselves. They
tend to be humble because they are not confused or grasping
or complaining. They are not particularly worried about
pleasing others because they have learned to please
themselves.
Sure, many people have become rich or powerful without this
extraordinary level of self-awareness (think of Elvis
Presley, Judy Garland, perhaps Bill Clinton or some
basketball players of recent notoriety), but the real
winners in life have figured out who they are and where
they are going in life. They are them SELVES. They are
unusually self-aware.

2. Top Achievers have Unusual Self-Acceptance
They know their strengths and weaknesses, they can laugh at
themselves and stand tall. They can stand alone when needed
and they can forgive any past mistakes or foolishness.
Because they are comfortable in their own skin, they have
the confidence to make clear decisions and walk boldly
forward. They accept those around them, as well. They know
that since no one is perfect, their parents, friends,
partners and neighbors have also made mistakes, and that is
"ok." It's part of life. They have an unusual ability to
accept life as it is and move forward.

3. Top Achievers have Unusual Self-Projection
Top achievers are willing to speak out and they expect to
make a difference. They volunteer, they try stuff, they
learn and they take risks. They are the "movers and
shakers", the ones who put themselves in the game. They
"stir things up." Sometimes they make trouble or ask hard
questions. They can be "politically incorrect" and may come
across as insensitive because they are willing to put
themselves INTO LIFE. (Fortunately, they are also among the
most sensitive, helpful and thoughtful people because they
are willing to reach out. They CARE!)

Because top achievers are unusually aware of themselves and
others, they are comfortable with their own power and can
use it to make a difference.
In the words of the ancient poet, the foundation for
achievement is to, "first know thyself and (then) to thine
own self be true."
Do This:
*** Keep a journal. Notice your values and preferences,
ponder the things that happen in life and strive to
understand them.
*** Forgive your past mistakes or blunders. You're human.
Welcome to the club!
*** Forgive others. The past is past and life is just
life. Let's get on with it!
*** Be yourself and let others know who you are. Face it,
we're all a bit "weird" and very individualistic. That's
the beauty of it!

The foundation for great achievement is Extreme Self-
Awareness. Get to know yourself. Be exactly who you truly
are. Want whatever you want, and go for it! Ask for stuff.
Try stuff. If you make mistakes, learn from them, pick
yourself up and go again. Nothing magnificent was ever
built on a foundation of doubt or "maybe." In 2019, make
yourself a promise to be "Self-ish" and go for it!

KEEPING IT SIMPLE

When I wrote that to have or achieve more, we must
first "become" more. Personal development, "being all you
can be", is clearly the first and most powerful step to a
happy, successful life.
In the past, learning to walk and talk, learning to read,
or drive a car or use a computer were skills that expanded
our world, and now as adults, every new level of personal
development continues to expand our world and lets us play
a "bigger game". The more we develop ALL of our potential,
the more opportunities we have and the more effectively we
can seize them.
And the wonderful thing is that personal development is not
"hard"! In fact, it is such a natural part of life that it
is almost impossible to stop the process. How would you
prevent a child from learning language? How would you stop
a child from making friends, playing games, or growing up?
Growth is the NATURAL state of things!
Human beings are naturally curious. We explore and poke
around. We ask questions and experiment. Our natural
curiosity and the desire to "be more" has created our
world. Our determination to "be more" has started
businesses, written great books, and given us the Internet.
And yet, tragically, very few of us plan our personal
growth as intentionally as we should, and I think there are
two major reasons that we get "stuck".
The first is that we are careless with our time. Only
rarely are human beings truly "stuck"! More often we are
just so rushed, so confused and so stressed that it's easier
to say "I don't have time" than to arrange our lives, solve
our problems and make progress.
The second reason we fail to "become more" is that we don't
know how. Our schools teach us "stuff", but they don't
necessarily teach us how to become powerful human beings.
Too often, education is really about mastering the fine art
of sitting still, and life requires more of us.
While any plan for personal development is better than
none, I prefer plans that are simple. I like simple. I
like easy. I like things I understand.
So, this week I am recommending a tremendous book by
Eric J. Aronson. The book is simply called, "DASH". I
hope you'll buy and read it.
Aronson points out that on our tombstones, our lives are
often depicted by a little "dash" between the date we were
born and the date we died. He wants that "dash" to be as
fulfilling and exciting as possible, so he's developed a
simple little acronym around that "DASH":
  D-etermination
  A-ttitude
  S-uccess
  H-appiness

Aren't those the four things that make life work out? You
can make it more complicated if you like, but for me this
little book makes a world of sense. I was sent a review
copy and expected to spend a few minutes glancing through
it, but I couldn't put it down! I read the entire book and
ended up building this issue of IMPACT around it. This is
very powerful material! 

MOTIVATION EVERY DAY

There's a wonderful quote from Zig Ziglar that "People
often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does
bathing. That's why we recommend it daily."
I am frequently amazed at the number of business people I
meet who will not listen to tapes or read books or attend
seminars. They don't have time to read, and the tapes
"don't work". They "can't afford" the seminars, and they
"don't need" the education. And then they wonder why their
careers seem to reach a plateau!
Even a badly done tape may contain a kernel of truth, or a
bit of wisdom, or like the TV show I saw, it may motivate
you to do your work better or differently or with more
integrity than "that guy." Motivation comes in all shapes
and sizes. Sometimes we are motivated by needing to pay the
bills, at other times we are motivated by an inspirational
seminar or the enthusiasm of a speaker.
Sometimes we are motivated by a desire to do better for our
families. Sometimes we are motivated by fear, but we are
almost always motivated when we are around exciting people
with great ideas, lots of energy and a clear vision of
where they are going. Motivation works!
As a business leader, there are important reasons to keep
yourself focused, enthused, energized and eager, and you
owe it to the people who look to you for leadership.
Whether you stay motivated by re-writing your goals every
day, or by listening to tapes, learning new skills or
attending rallies, do whatever it takes. Your success
tomorrow depends on your level of motivation, commitment
and determination today.

BACK-OFFICE EXCELLENCE

This week I read an MBA case-study about a company that was
increasing sales and gross revenues by over 60% a year, but
managed to go bankrupt. The problem? They weren't keeping
an eye on costs, or to put it another way, no one was
watching the store.
Most entrepreneurs love to focus on "sales."
Understandably, we love our products and we love our
customers, and the temptation is to measure "success" based
on what are often called "top-line" numbers.
If we sold 100 units last year, and sales increase to 500
units this year, surely we are doing much better, right?
Unfortunately, the answer is, "Not always."
Every business must monitor the actual profitability of the
enterprise. Whether you are a single entrepreneur (perhaps
a sales rep or solo professional) or own a small business
or run a huge multinational, the principle is always the
same. Increased sales are nice; increased PROFITS are
better.
Profits are what you get to keep, and the only way to
measure how much you are actually making is to track the
numbers. There are many number of accounting systems and
packages available. The key is to work with a good
accountant and find the best (and simplest) system that
will truly give you all the information you need to manage
wisely.
Too many small business owners neglect the "paper work."
They tend to do the minimum of meeting payroll and
balancing the checkbook, and leave other "details" for
"later." That can lead to disaster!
Business owners have many jobs, including providing
leadership, innovation and sales, but one of your most
important (and most-often neglected) is to track the
numbers. Your job is not done until the paperwork is
complete!
Track the numbers. They are your key to profits and wealth!

MANAGING TIME AND SPACE

Every week I hear comments about being "too busy" or
"having too much to do." We live in a time of stress and
tight schedules. We are on the run, with too many options
and too many responsibilities, and sometimes it feels like
we MUST do them all TODAY!!!!
Often, I hear people ask for help with "time management"
when what we really need is a system for LIFE MANAGEMENT.
And here is an outline I often share with my clients. I
call it the Life-Management Progression and I think it is a
powerful concept that has implications for every area of life.
As I see it, we go through various "stages" of managing our
lives to achieve our goals and create the things we want in
life. I see us working our way up the pyramid, from the
least-effective (but most common) strategies to strategies
that are profoundly and effortlessly transforming:
1. TIME MANAGEMENT is the most common and the least
effective way to run our lives. We don't own time and it
cannot be managed. Time just "is" and it flows quickly.
What we can manage are things like our activities, our
choices, and our personal environments. If you don't
actively manage these things, other people will certainly
try to manage them for you, with frustrating results.
2. ACTIVITY MANAGEMENT has the virtue of being "do-able".
We can choose our priorities and manage our actions through
the day. Practice "single handling" whenever possible. Do
one thing at a time and do it well. Avoid dead-end
activities at all costs! Use a daily calendar and a weekly
planner. These are rather crude tools, but they are a
powerful beginning.
3. ENERGY MANAGEMENT is what most people are actually
hoping for with time/activity management. They want to get
more done with less effort and have something left for "me"
at the end of the day. Manage your energy. Sleep well, rest
often, be efficient. Do your most important work when you
are most awake. Put your best efforts into your most
important priorities and let things of secondary importance
get secondary effort. It's not the quickest or easiest path
to the good life, but it's a great start.
4. SPACE MANAGEMENT - Now things get interesting! Manage
your environment so it's hard for people and things to
interrupt you. Close the door, turn off the phone!
Eliminate anything that annoys or frustrates you - fix it,
replace it, or junk it. Make your office, car, kitchen,
bedroom and bathroom "perfect" for you. Paint the walls,
replace your desk! Take action to make things better, more
comfortable, more inspiring. You'll get more done and have
more fun doing it.
5. YOUR PERSONAL ECO-SYSTEM - This is what we're
looking for! Create a life-system that "pulls" you forward.
Surround yourself with things and people who inspire you
and make you happy, who give you energy, and who make you
productive and joyful. Even your computer should make you
smile! Fill your life with people who challenge you to be
your best. Be pro-active in every area of life so you live
well and can do the work you are called to do!

Over 100 years ago, Henry Thoreau made his famous
observation that most people live "lives of quiet
desperation" and I think it is high time we changed that.
It is entirely possible to lead a life of high productivity
and simple joy. It is possible to be focused, rested and
"on purpose" most of the time. It is not easy in our busy
world, but it is possible and you deserve nothing less.

HAPPINESS: KEY TO MEASURE SUCCESS

Your ability to achieve your own happiness is the key measure of your success, of how well you are doing as a person.

You learn the key to happiness that has been the same through all of history. You learn how to dispel the two myths that may be holding you back and how to achieve more happiness in everything you do.

Dedicate Yourself to Your Best Talents

The key to happiness is this: dedicate yourself to the development of your natural talents and abilities by doing what you love to do and doing it better and better in the service of a cause that is greater than yourself.

This is a big statement and a big commitment. Being happy requires that you define your life in your own terms and then throw your whole heart into living your life to the fullest. In a way, happiness requires that you be perfectly selfish in order to develop yourself to a point where you can be unselfish for the rest of your life.

Please Yourself First

In Edmond Rostand's play Cyrano de Bergerac, Cyrano is asked why he is so intensely individualistic and unconcerned with the opinions and judgments of others. He replies with these wonderful words: "I am what I am because early in life I decided that I would please at least myself in all things."

Your happiness likewise depends upon your ability to please at least yourself in all things. You can be happy only when you are living your life in the very best way possible. No one can define happiness for you. Only you know what makes you happy. Happiness is an inside job.

Your Happiness is Up to You

The biggest myth about happiness is when people say that it is not legitimate or correct for you to put your happiness ahead of everyone else's. Throughout my life, I've met people who have said that it is more important to make other people happy than it is to make yourself happy. This is nonsense.

The fact is that you can't give away to anyone else what you don't have for yourself. Just as you can't give money to the poor if you don't have any, you can't make someone else happy if you yourself are miserable.

The very best way to assure the happiness of others is to be happy yourself and then to share your happiness with them. Suffering and self-sacrifice merely depress and discourage other people. If you want to make others happy, start by living the kind of life and doing the kind of things that make you happy. 

Action Exercises

Here are three steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, define for yourself the activities that you really love and enjoy, at home and work, and then organize your life so you do more of them.

Second, believe in yourself and trust your own feelings. Then, please at least yourself in all things.