WHAT GETS MEASURED GETS DONE

One of my favorite quotes is from Edward Deming, the famous
business consultant who revolutionized management theory.
He observed that in the end, what we measure and hold
ourselves accountable for, gets done.
Nobody likes being embarrassed by publicly failing to
complete a task, and for most of us, the personal integrity
issue is even more potent. Once we've committed ourselves
to complete a task or reach an objective, we HATE falling
short. I think that actually explains a lot of failure,
both in business and in our personal lives.
We hate failing so much we fear to set objective,
measurable expectations. We have dreams or wishes or
fantasies (call them what you will) but we hesitate to set
hard, measurable performance goals.
I see this in talking with people who are "interested" in
coaching. When we interview each other they tell me they
are "ready" or "want" to achieve more than they have in the
past. When I ask them what they want to achieve, they often
hesitate and then give me a wonderful-sounding but vague
statement about being "successful." Success is not a thing
to be achieved! Success is the result, almost a side-
benefit of achieving specific, measurable results. Success
is the popular acclaim or recognition we enjoy after we
complete far more specific (and less spectacular) tasks.
If you want "success" make more sales than anyone in your
company. If you want "success" win some races or publish a
best-seller. If you want "success," do the things that get
the results you desire. I guarantee, "success" will follow,
but only AFTER you've achieved those more mundane, hard,
measurable results.

3 TIPS FOR SUCCESSFULLY ENDING AN ARGUMENT

Let’s face it: Given enough time, arguments are an inevitable part of every single relationship – even the happiest ones.
We All Argue
It doesn’t matter how great your marriage relationship is or how happily married you are, it is practically guaranteed that, at some point, you and your spouse will argue over something.
There are perhaps as many things to argue about as there are stars in the universe. And just like the stars, some arguments can be small and dull, and others can be bigger and more… explosive.
One disclaimer before we continue:
There are some situations, such as those involving domestic violence, drug or alcohol abuse, that without question require more attention and even professional help. We are not referring to such arguments and situations over here. We are referring exclusively to the common, everyday situations that may spark an argument in a healthy marriage, such as dealing with housework, finances, leisure time, intimacy, etc.
Handling Disagreements Productively
Having made clear that we are not referring to violent situations or extreme cases, here are 3 tips that you can apply next time you and your spouse start to bicker about something:
1. Ask yourself: “Is this really worth arguing over?”
For example – is it really crucial that your spouse places the dirty laundry inside the color-coded laundry hampers that you use to separate different laundry loads? Is it absolutely necessary that your spouse attends the parent-teacher meeting when you both know your child is doing great in school and you’ll only get positive feedback? Does the fact that your spouse spent an extra $5 on the brand-name product instead of the generic brand really make a major impact in the family budget?
The thing is… Sometimes arguing is far more trouble than it’s worth.
When you are facing this type of situation, try to solve it with a more calm, civilized approach: conversation.
Without raising your voice or getting angry over it, explain to your spouse why you dislike a particular behavior, action or situation. Sometimes your spouse simply doesn’t realize how important such thing is for you.
For example, instead of yelling out “you put your stupid red shirt in the white hamper again!” try the following: “When doing laundry I separate whites from colors to prevent clothes from getting ruined. It makes life a lot easier for me when you put your red shirt in the color hamper ‘cause I don’t have to spend extra time sorting it before loading the washer.”
2. Try the big “C”… For Compromise!
Back in the days when you were single, it was very likely that most, if not all, the time, you got to do things your way.
However, continuing this lifestyle once you have tied the knot can bring a lot of friction within the marriage, and, in extreme cases, even lead to divorce.
Part of the joy of marriage comes from sharing your life with your spouse. And unless you have married a clone of yourself (which would be terribly boring anyway,) this will very likely require mutual compromise in certain situations.
To avoid conflict, start by having a conversation with your spouse about the things that you each enjoy. And once you find out, don’t try to change them! Do not expect your sports-loving spouse to take you to the one-day shoe sale on the day of a big game. And don’t tell your spouse that the new Jennifer Aniston movie is stupid, cheesy and “not worth a trip to the big screen” when you know she loves romantic comedies.
The key here is for both of you to do the best to “meet in the middle” instead of dealing with the situation like cats and dogs. Maybe you can let your spouse watch the game while you go shoe shopping with your sister. Or maybe this time you’ll watch the romantic comedy at the movies and promise that the next time you’ll see an action flick that your spouse will enjoy. It’s as easy and simple as that.
3. When all else fails… Agree to disagree.
Sometimes arguments can lead to a dead end where there can’t be any compromise.
While in ideal circumstances you and your partner should do the best you can to resolve your differences in an argument, sometimes that can be a bit more complicated.
Maybe the reason for the argument has to do with your personal beliefs, the way you were brought up or certain ideology you strongly support… Which you don’t necessarily share with your spouse.
Take a moment and go back to Tip #1 and carefully assess if it is really worth arguing over such thing.
We all have our differences – it’s what makes each of us unique!
Remind yourself that your spouse is entitled to his or her own opinions and points of view, which not necessarily have to be exactly the same as yours.
These differences can take many shapes…
Maybe your spouse is a meat lover and you are a vegetarian.
Maybe you side with the Democrat ideals while your spouse is a registered Republican.
Maybe one of you loves to work on a Windows PC while the other won’t consider anything other than a Mac.
Whatever it is, remember that you married your spouse for the whole person that he or she is, along with everything that comes with it… There is much more to him or her than those beliefs or ideals which you may disagree on.
So, in case of an argument based on that, both of you simply have to “agree to disagree.”
And that’s it. It’s a perfectly accepted option and there will be no more arguing. No more trying to prove why your point of view is right and your spouse’s is wrong, mainly because there is no such thing.
Acknowledge your differences and give each other a hug and a kiss. End of argument.

POSITIVE ADDICTIONS

I saw a biography of George Bush, the Elder (President 41,
as he's often called) this week. I was reminded that he
jumped out of an airplane to celebrate his 85th birthday.
And then, five years later, he did it again to celebrate
his 90th birthday! I thought that was remarkable and
appreciated that he did it to remind all of us to stay
active and keep doing new and interesting things. I took it
as a personal challenge to wonder what I might try in the
next five years. How about you?
What will you achieve, learn, start (or stop) in the next
five years? How many perfectly good airplanes will you jump
out of?
There's an old quote that, "five years from now you'll be
exactly who you are, and where you are, except for the
people you meet and the books you read." I always like to
add that there are more ways to grow and change, but the
point is well taken. Getting older is automatic; growth is
a choice.
Many years ago, William Glasser wrote a wonderful little
book called, "Positive Addiction." Glasser has written many
books and my impression is that this one sold fewer copies
than his others, and that's a shame. There are many
wonderful "positive addictions."
Glasser talked about being addicted to exercise and
fitness, or to the joys of relationships and creativity. I
want to propose that personal development fits in that
category. It's a good thing and like most addictions, it
begins with a few clumsy or uncomfortable experiences, and
gradually becomes a core part of who we are.
Why not choose to be addicted to positive things?
I know people who are positively addicted to saving and
investment. They get a thrill from adding to their savings
account every paycheck. They watch their investment
balances go up and up. To relax on Saturdays, they look at
investment properties or read annual reports, looking for
the next opportunity.
Now, obviously, any positive addiction can go over-the-top
and become a destructive obsession. Many years ago I loved
running to the point that I gave myself a stress fracture--
broke my leg--from running through pain! That was not good!
But here are some positive addictions I encourage you to
consider:
1. Reading. Books open the world to us. Through books we
get to know the most famous, creative, powerful and
interesting people who ever lived. We can travel to other
galaxies, expose ourselves to the past, and the future. We
can experience other cultures and learn skills. We can "try
on" ideas—and lives—we will never experience any other way.
Read!
2. Exercise. I'm talking about fitness and health and
movement and fun, not Olympic championships. For most of
us, exercise is about play and being alive. It's about
tennis or golf with friends, or basketball with our kids.
It's about climbing a mountain or a bike ride on a Saturday
morning. Exercise may add years to our lives; it definitely
adds life to our years.
3. Ponder. Long ago a philosopher said, "the unobserved
life is not worth living." I'm not sure I would go that
far, but taking time to observe, to wonder, to contemplate
and take notes definitely makes things better. Keep a
journal. Pray or meditate. Enjoy moments of solitude, or
respectfully debate the important things of life with a
trusted companion. A great life doesn't happen by accident.
It's the result of the careful, thoughtful choices we make.
4. Save money. Brian Tracy once said that "if you cannot
save money, greatness is not in you." Again, that might be
a bit extreme, but money is a representation of our lives.
It's the result of the work and skill and contribution we
make in the world. Saving creates opportunities and opens
doors. It's insurance against misfortune and a source of
self-respect. An addiction to saving definitely beats an
addiction to spending!
5. Be curious. One of the most important traits of high
achievers is that they are eager for new ideas and new
skills. They are always "beginners" in at least one
important area of life—willing to be clumsy or make
mistakes while they learn new things. I'll go so far as to
say if you aren't willing to be a clumsy beginner, you are
refusing to grow and that's a terrible thing. Try stuff!
You don't have to jump out of airplanes to develop a
positive addiction to personal growth! Practice your
addiction to exploring your life and becoming all that you
can be. Whatever calls you, explore it! Jim Rohn observed
that the vital importance of goals is not what we get from
achieving them, but what we become in the process. Choose
your addictions wisely, then invest in them and see where
they take you.

IN MARKETING, R = (N X I) - C

Every week, there is a desire by business owners 

to grow their revenue, and many of those requests
focus on marketing. It seems most professionals, from
Accountants to Veterinarians want more customers.
 Here is a developed a formula that helps clients strategize
their marketing campaigns and it works like this: 

R = (N x I) – C
The amount of new Revenue (R) created by a marketing
program is a product of the Number of people (N) in your
audience, multiplied by the Impact (I) of your
presentation, minus the Cost (C) of the campaign. It's very
simple. To increase revenue, you must either reach more
people, increase the impact of your presentation, or reduce
the cost. Here are three examples.
A radio ad in a major market might reach a million
listeners (N), but the impact (I) will be very small and
the cost (C) may be too high. Changing the ad to a radio
talk-show might still reach the same number of listeners,
but by increasing the Impact, you'll attract more business
and perhaps reduce the cost.
Similarly, a speech to a local service club might have an
audience (N) of 100 people, but if your presentation
creates enough Impact (I) and the cost of doing it is very
low, you may attract several new clients at minimal cost.
If you mail 1000 brochures, and the Impact (I) or "response
rate" is 1%, and the cost of printing and postage is fifty
cents per brochure, then the formula of R = (N x I) - C
works out to be:  Ten Clients = (1000 x 1%) - $500.
You can attract more business and increase profits by
increasing the Number of prospects, by increasing the
Impact you have on each of them, or by reducing your Costs.
Some people prefer contacting lots of people via the
Internet, while others prefer the personal contact of doing
workshops. Any method can work, but the formula remains the
same:  R = (N x I) – C.

THOUGHTS ON PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

I want to talk about reading and education. This week, I

happened to see one of those "news" stories where the
reporter interviews ordinary people and asks them about
current events. This time, the questions were about
identifying people from politics and entertainment. Most
people could identify music and movies stars, but
were clueless about the Vice President and political
candidates.
As always, it was outrageous and silly.
As a student of history, it made me very sad.
Obviously, there is far more to education and personal
development than history. There are languages and
architecture. There are music and art, technology and
travel to be considered. There are the skills associated
with cooking, parenting and investing. Personal Development
covers a multitude of interests and topics.
Even the topic of Personal Development is, in itself, an
interesting topic. In the eighteenth century, personal
development was mostly concerned with personal virtue. Ben
Franklin had thirteen virtues which he studied in sequence,
over and over, throughout his life. He would focus on
Thrift or Honesty for an entire week, then move on to the
next virtue for a week, thus spending four weeks every year
on each of his thirteen virtues.
In the nineteenth century, the focus of personal
development gradually came to focus on education more
broadly. An educated person was expected to read both Greek
and Latin, and to be familiar with the Great Books and
philosophy. Every emigrant, even settlers on the Frontier
(in the U.S.), wanted their children to be literate and
understand American history.
In the twentieth century, personal development was all
about financial success, power and influence. Dale
Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" was
one of the best-selling books of the century, along with
Napoleon Hill's "Think and Grow Rich." Everyone who wanted
to become someone read the books or listened to audio
programs to get ahead.
Today, our options include all of the above, plus endless
additions. For many of us, however, personal development
has been reduced to mastering our phones and gathering
friends on Facebook. There is nothing wrong with mastering
these forms of communication! But we have so many more
options!
We can focus on our personal virtues, on history or art. We
can learn languages, either online or by visiting other
countries and cultures. We can practice a martial art or
paint. We can furnish our homes with our own woodworking
projects, or develop our culinary skills. We can learn to
ski or sail, or skateboard, scuba dive or scale mountains.
But too often, we do our work (often to the point of
exhaustion), then we run errands and watch TV. And
personally, I nap.
To me, this does not seem to represent the height of human
potential! Whatever interests or excites you, explore it!
Practice being a "beginner" or an "amateur" (in the classic
sense), who learns and grows, stretches and masters new
things for the sheer joy of it. Read! Turn from the sitcoms
to real news, documentaries, histories and travelogues.
Learn to invest both your time and your money--it will pay
enormous profits and make your life richer in the bargain.
Personal development is a never-ending process that will
make you a better, happier person.
Get good at learning.

DO YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY?

Achieving your own happiness is the best measure of how well you are living your life and enjoying your relationships. Did you know that you can learn how to be happier and more fulfilled in everything you do?  Here's how...

Everyone is Different

Happiness in life is like a smorgasbord. If 100 people went to a smorgasbord and each put food on their plate in the quantity and mix that each felt would be most pleasing to him, every plate would be different. Even a husband and wife would go up to the smorgasbord and come back with plates that looked completely different. Happiness is the same way. Each person requires a particular combination of those ingredients to feel the very best about himself or herself.

Listen to Your Heart

And your mix is changing continually. If you went to the same smorgasbord every day for a year, you probably would come back with a different plateful of food each time. Each day-sometimes each hour-only you can tell what it takes to make you happy. Therefore, the only way to judge whether a job, a relationship, an investment, or any decision, is right for you is to get in touch with your feelings and listen to your heart.

Be True to Yourself

You’re true to yourself only when you follow your inner light, when you listen to what Ralph Waldo Emerson called the “still, small voice within.” You’re being the very best person you can be only when you have the courage and the fortitude to allow your definition of happiness, whatever it may be, to be the guiding light of every part of your life.

There Are No Limits

A very important point on the subject of happiness is whether or not you feel that you “deserve” to be happy.

Accept the notion that you deserve all the happiness you can honestly attain through the application of your talents and abilities. The more you like and respect yourself, the more deserving you will feel of the good things in life. And the more deserving you feel, the more likely you will attain and hold on to the happiness you are working toward.

Make Happiness Your Key Measure

You should make happiness the organizing principle of your life. Compare every possible action and decision you make against your standard of happiness to see whether that action would make you happier or unhappier. Soon, you will discover that almost all of the problems in your life come from choices that you have made - or are currently making - that do not contribute to your happiness.

Pay the Price

Of course, there are countless times when you will have to do little things that don’t make you happy along the way toward those larger things that make you very happy indeed. We call this paying the price of success in advance. You must pay your dues. Sometimes these interim steps don’t make you happy directly, but the happiness you achieve from attaining your goal will be so great that it totally overwhelms the temporary inconveniences and dis-satisfactions you have to endure in order to get there.

Action Exercises

Here are 3 steps you can take immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, accept that you deserve all the joy and happiness you can possibly achieve through your own efforts.

Second, make your own happiness the chief organizing principle of your life and judge everything against that standard.

Third, be willing to work hard and pay the price for the satisfaction and rewards you desire. Always go the extra mile and your success will be assured.

THE CARE AND KEEPING OF CUSTOMERS

The first question any business must understand is WHAT
business they are actually in.
Most people think McDonald's is in the restaurant or
hamburger business, but many analysts have observed that
they are actually in a variety of businesses.  They are in
real estate development. They are in the entertainment
business. But most of all, they are in the customer service
business.
Every business is first, last, and always in the business
of providing superior service to its customers.
It costs a fortune to attract a new customer. The time,
money, energy, anxiety and effort to get a new first-time
customer in the door is a huge expense. No business has the
resources to attract and serve only new customers. The key
is in keeping and serving the customers you already have
and profiting from their repeat business over time.
No matter what business you think you are in, your first
business is in serving and partnering with your customers.
It's called customer retention. Sometimes it's called "up-
selling." It goes by many names, but the principle is the
same:  Nurture and keep your customers!
Customer service is about reliability and relationship.
It's about trust. It's about the quality of your product,
but even more, it's about the quality of your service
before, during and long after the sale.