If you have read my articles or heard me speak, you know that I always come down to action. We need to act if we are going to be successful!
Yet, our success starts long before our actions. In fact, our success begins in our thoughts.
The process is that thoughts become actions and actions produce results. So the equation starts with the thoughts. So the key to success is to start with and control the thoughts that we have. Good thoughts become good actions become good results.
But there is this predicament we have as humans. It is this “battle” we have with our thoughts. Thoughts of depression, negative thoughts, thoughts of fear etc constantly creep into our minds and cause us to act in certain ways that are going to produce the antithesis of the kind we want that will produce success.
So what can we do to win the battle with thoughts? Here are a few main points. Apply these immediately and then constantly and you will be on your way to winning the thought battle.
Guard your mind. Pretend that behind that forehead of yours is a very precious thing – your mind – because it is precious. If you had a storehouse of gold in your house, you would hire an armed guard to stand watch and keep all the bad guys out. Yet, many of us let any old ting come into our minds. We need to keep the bad thoughts, the negative thoughts O-U-T! Now when I say this, I mean both the ones that start in our heads and the ones that come from external sources.
Proactively place good thoughts in your head. Just like a garden, where you weed, or pull the bad stuff out, and plant, put the good stuff in, so we do the same thing with our thoughts. Buy tapes and music that will produce good, happy thoughts in your head! Watch TV programs and videos that put good thoughts in your head!
Avoid the naysayers. They are all around you. You work with them, you live near them – some are even in your family! Whatever you do, do not let them affect you with their negative thoughts. Spend as little time as you can with them (unless it is your spouse or kids – then you need counseling!)
Act on the positive thoughts that you do have. When a positive thought comes into your head, act on it! This will begin to produce a “bridge” between what you think and how you act! This will then make that transition even easier as time goes by!
Four key ideas to win the thought battle:
- Guard your mind.
- Proactively place good thoughts in your head.
- Avoid the naysayers.
- Act on the positive thoughts that you do have.
Go forth and Win the Battle!
Friday, November 28, 2008
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
DEVELOPING THE THANK YOU NOTES HABIT
I learned the value and power of thank you notes early in life. When I was a young child, my parents occasionally went out with friends for dinner. Invariably, when my parents returned from an evening out, I saw my mother sit down at her little desk in the hallway as soon as she got home and begin to write. One night I asked her what she was doing. Her answer came straight out of Emily Post: “We had such a wonderful time with our dear friends this evening that I want to jot them a note to thank them for their friendship and the wonderful dinner.” My mother’s simple act of gratitude, expressed to people who already knew that she and my father appreciated and enjoyed their friendship, helped to keep my parents’ friendships strong for their entire lifetimes.
Because I understood that building relationships is what selling is all about, I began early in my career to send thank you notes to people. I set a goal to send ten thank you notes every day. That goal meant that I had to meet and get the names of at least ten people every day. I sent thank you notes to people I met briefly, people I showed properties to, people I talked with on the telephone, and people I actually helped to own new homes. I became a thank you note fool. And guess what happened? By the end of my third year in sales, my business was 100% referrals! The people I had expressed gratitude to were happy to send me new clients as a reward for making them feel appreciated and important.
I understand that you may not be comfortable at first with starting the Thank You note habit so I took the time to write out ten situations in which sending a Thank You note is appropriate. Then, to help you even more, I’ve drafted the notes for you.
1. Telephone contact. Thank you for talking with me on the telephone. In today’s business world, time is precious. You can rest assured that I will always be respectful of the time you invest as we discuss the possibility of a mutually beneficial business relationship.
2. In Person Contact. Thank you. It was a pleasure meeting you, and my thank you is for the time we shared. We have been fortunate to serve many happy clients, and it is my wish to some day be able to serve you. If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to call.
3. After Demonstration or Presentation. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to discuss with you our association for the mutual benefit of our firms. We believe that quality, blended with excellent service, is the foundation for a successful business.
4. After Purchase. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to offer you our finest service. We are confident that you will be happy with this investment towards future growth. My goal is now to offer excellent follow-up service so you will have no reservations about referring others to me who have similar needs as yours.
5. For a Referral. Thank you for your kind referral. You may rest assured that anyone you refer to me will receive the highest degree of professional service possible.
6. After Final Refusal. Thank you for taking your time to consider letting me serve you. It is with sincere regrets that your immediate plans do not include making the investment at this time. However, if you need further information or have any questions, please feel free to call. I will keep you posted on new developments and changes that may benefit you.
7. After They Buy From Someone Else. Thank you for taking your time to analyze my services. I regret being unable, at this time, to prove to you the benefits we have to offer. We keep constantly informed of new developments and changes, so I will keep in touch with the hope that in the years ahead we will be able to do business.
8. After They Buy From Someone Else, But Offer to Give You Referrals. Thank you for your gracious offer of giving me referrals. As we discussed, I am enclosing three of my business cards. I thank you in advance for placing them in the hands of three of your friends, acquaintances, or relatives that I might serve. I will keep in touch and be willing to render my services as needed.
9. To Anyone Who Gives You Service. Thank you. It is gratifying to meet someone dedicated to doing a good job. Your efforts are sincerely appreciated. If my company or I can serve you in any way, please don’t hesitate to call.
10. Anniversary Thank You. Thank you. It is with warm regards that I send this note to say hello and again, thanks for your past patronage. We are continually changing and improving our products and services. The power of expressed gratitude is immense. Put this tool to work for you today!
Because I understood that building relationships is what selling is all about, I began early in my career to send thank you notes to people. I set a goal to send ten thank you notes every day. That goal meant that I had to meet and get the names of at least ten people every day. I sent thank you notes to people I met briefly, people I showed properties to, people I talked with on the telephone, and people I actually helped to own new homes. I became a thank you note fool. And guess what happened? By the end of my third year in sales, my business was 100% referrals! The people I had expressed gratitude to were happy to send me new clients as a reward for making them feel appreciated and important.
I understand that you may not be comfortable at first with starting the Thank You note habit so I took the time to write out ten situations in which sending a Thank You note is appropriate. Then, to help you even more, I’ve drafted the notes for you.
1. Telephone contact. Thank you for talking with me on the telephone. In today’s business world, time is precious. You can rest assured that I will always be respectful of the time you invest as we discuss the possibility of a mutually beneficial business relationship.
2. In Person Contact. Thank you. It was a pleasure meeting you, and my thank you is for the time we shared. We have been fortunate to serve many happy clients, and it is my wish to some day be able to serve you. If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to call.
3. After Demonstration or Presentation. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to discuss with you our association for the mutual benefit of our firms. We believe that quality, blended with excellent service, is the foundation for a successful business.
4. After Purchase. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to offer you our finest service. We are confident that you will be happy with this investment towards future growth. My goal is now to offer excellent follow-up service so you will have no reservations about referring others to me who have similar needs as yours.
5. For a Referral. Thank you for your kind referral. You may rest assured that anyone you refer to me will receive the highest degree of professional service possible.
6. After Final Refusal. Thank you for taking your time to consider letting me serve you. It is with sincere regrets that your immediate plans do not include making the investment at this time. However, if you need further information or have any questions, please feel free to call. I will keep you posted on new developments and changes that may benefit you.
7. After They Buy From Someone Else. Thank you for taking your time to analyze my services. I regret being unable, at this time, to prove to you the benefits we have to offer. We keep constantly informed of new developments and changes, so I will keep in touch with the hope that in the years ahead we will be able to do business.
8. After They Buy From Someone Else, But Offer to Give You Referrals. Thank you for your gracious offer of giving me referrals. As we discussed, I am enclosing three of my business cards. I thank you in advance for placing them in the hands of three of your friends, acquaintances, or relatives that I might serve. I will keep in touch and be willing to render my services as needed.
9. To Anyone Who Gives You Service. Thank you. It is gratifying to meet someone dedicated to doing a good job. Your efforts are sincerely appreciated. If my company or I can serve you in any way, please don’t hesitate to call.
10. Anniversary Thank You. Thank you. It is with warm regards that I send this note to say hello and again, thanks for your past patronage. We are continually changing and improving our products and services. The power of expressed gratitude is immense. Put this tool to work for you today!
Monday, November 24, 2008
YOUR TOOLS FOR SUCCESS IN 2009
About 100 years ago, Mark Twain observed that "the difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lightening and the lightening bug," and that applies to the tools we use every day.A while back, Mary and I spent a few days on the Oregon coast for a bit of renewal and goal-setting. We stayed in a lovely condominium, right on the beach with a beautiful fireplace, nice furniture and a fantastic view of the sunset. Everything was perfect, except....The knives in the kitchen were cheap, mismatched, and dull. The first evening, I squashed (rather than sliced) a tomato and later I struggled to trim a steak. Small things, but really, really annoying! The next day we drove into town and I found a housewares shop, spent a few dollars for a good knife, and returned with my "treasure." That knife made cooking easier and my weekend better!
It's a trivial story, so what's the point? Simple: The winners in life use good tools, including sharp knives!High achievers invest in themselves, their business and their future. They have a great coach, a strong support team, and they keep their tools "sharp" all the time. And, what intrigues me, is how little it costs to have the best. In fact, it doesn't "cost"--it pays to have good tools!What exactly are these high-quality tools?Some professions need to impress clients with fancy offices or elaborate technical equipment, but far more often the winners in life invest in tools that are amazingly simple and sometimes, they're free! Here are some examples:
1. Written goals. Winners use a notebook, ring-binder or similar document to identify their most important objectives. They know where they are going. They know their outcomes in advance and their only investment is a pen, a piece of paper and a few hours' time.
2. A calendar. I prefer year-at-a-glance wall calendars so we can color-code important dates far ahead of time. We color in our birthdays and anniversary, vacations and family times. We use a different color for business trips and similar commitments. It lets us see the ebb-and-flow of our lives; it keeps us focused and excited all year long.
3. A daily plan. I use little 3x5 cards. My assistant uses her electronic planner. There are lots of systems on the market, but the key is to plan each day in advance, selecting your priorities and doing the most important things first. High achievers plan the night before, or first thing in the morning. They know the value of a day, and never leave it to chance.
4. A support team. Whether you have a business partner, a professional coach, or a master-mind group, winners have advisors to keep them on track and focused. President Roosevelt called it his "kitchen cabinet" (separate from his official Cabinet officers) and they helped him set his course.
5. Thinking time. High achievers schedule time to plan, to review, to brain-storm and review, to meditate or journal. High achievers have a system to maintain perspective and chart their course. Bill Gates takes an entire week every three months to plan, and it seems to have worked well for him.
6. Great equipment. Mainly, I'm talking about your personal computer but the principle applies to whatever equipment you use. I am frequently amazed at the bright, ambitious winners who contact me for coaching and in our interview I learn that they "can't afford" to up-grade their equipment or "don't have time" to master the software they already have! Would you hire a carpenter with a rusty saw or a broken hammer? Winners own and use good tools!
I'll close with another personal story. My preferred form of exercise has always been walking and jogging, and I still remember when I bought my first pair of specialized running shoes, about 30 years ago. I had no idea shoes could make such a difference! My legs stopped aching, I ran further and faster, and I was astonished! In the store the shoes seemed terribly expensive; the first morning, I knew they were a bargain! Good tools make all the difference.
It's a trivial story, so what's the point? Simple: The winners in life use good tools, including sharp knives!High achievers invest in themselves, their business and their future. They have a great coach, a strong support team, and they keep their tools "sharp" all the time. And, what intrigues me, is how little it costs to have the best. In fact, it doesn't "cost"--it pays to have good tools!What exactly are these high-quality tools?Some professions need to impress clients with fancy offices or elaborate technical equipment, but far more often the winners in life invest in tools that are amazingly simple and sometimes, they're free! Here are some examples:
1. Written goals. Winners use a notebook, ring-binder or similar document to identify their most important objectives. They know where they are going. They know their outcomes in advance and their only investment is a pen, a piece of paper and a few hours' time.
2. A calendar. I prefer year-at-a-glance wall calendars so we can color-code important dates far ahead of time. We color in our birthdays and anniversary, vacations and family times. We use a different color for business trips and similar commitments. It lets us see the ebb-and-flow of our lives; it keeps us focused and excited all year long.
3. A daily plan. I use little 3x5 cards. My assistant uses her electronic planner. There are lots of systems on the market, but the key is to plan each day in advance, selecting your priorities and doing the most important things first. High achievers plan the night before, or first thing in the morning. They know the value of a day, and never leave it to chance.
4. A support team. Whether you have a business partner, a professional coach, or a master-mind group, winners have advisors to keep them on track and focused. President Roosevelt called it his "kitchen cabinet" (separate from his official Cabinet officers) and they helped him set his course.
5. Thinking time. High achievers schedule time to plan, to review, to brain-storm and review, to meditate or journal. High achievers have a system to maintain perspective and chart their course. Bill Gates takes an entire week every three months to plan, and it seems to have worked well for him.
6. Great equipment. Mainly, I'm talking about your personal computer but the principle applies to whatever equipment you use. I am frequently amazed at the bright, ambitious winners who contact me for coaching and in our interview I learn that they "can't afford" to up-grade their equipment or "don't have time" to master the software they already have! Would you hire a carpenter with a rusty saw or a broken hammer? Winners own and use good tools!
I'll close with another personal story. My preferred form of exercise has always been walking and jogging, and I still remember when I bought my first pair of specialized running shoes, about 30 years ago. I had no idea shoes could make such a difference! My legs stopped aching, I ran further and faster, and I was astonished! In the store the shoes seemed terribly expensive; the first morning, I knew they were a bargain! Good tools make all the difference.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
STRICKLY BUSINESS: HOW TO LOSE CUSTOMERS, FAST!
I had an astonishingly bad experience with a major clothing store this week, and I want to tell you about it. Perhaps it will remind all of us that perceptions count and integrity matters.As a favor to Mary I agreed to call a major catalog retailer and order some outfits she had picked out. I figured it would take 10 minutes to call the number, order the items, bill the credit card, and be done with it. And it might have been that simple except for one little thing.At the end of the call, the order taker asked permission to "include information about our travel club" in the shipment. I wasn't interested and vaguely replied that would be fine. She then repeated the offer and said she needed a specific yes or no. That got my attention and I started asking questions.It turns out that once I agreed to her offer, I was actually agreeing to let them bill my credit card for membership in the club unless I specifically declined within thirty days. Later, a supervisor admitted that almost everyone ignores the offer and throws it away with the paperwork they put in every shipment. Then, thirty days later, the company bills their credit cards.I suppose what they are doing is perfectly legal, but I found it outrageous! For a $39 membership fee, they lost us as customers, forever. In one stupid move, they trashed their reputation and we won't be back.My point? Trust is a vital business asset. Honesty, integrity, fairness and openness may be the "right" things, but they are also the SMART things when it comes to business! Never trick your customers! Never appear to take a short-cut, and always make the customer glad they did business with you.
Quotes of the Week
"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now." -- Goethe
"In each of us are places where we have never gone. Only by pressing the limits do you ever find them." -- Dr. Joyce Brothers
"The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own self" -- Montaigne
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." -- Walt Disney
Quotes of the Week
"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now." -- Goethe
"In each of us are places where we have never gone. Only by pressing the limits do you ever find them." -- Dr. Joyce Brothers
"The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own self" -- Montaigne
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." -- Walt Disney
Monday, November 17, 2008
HOW TO CREATE THE LIFE YOU DESERVE
Many years ago I heard Jim Rohn say that we all get the results we deserve. He acknowledge that some of us are afflicted with limitations, illness or situations that seem wildly unfair, but in terms of how we live our lives, he argued that we get the results we deserve.I was very skeptical, even outraged. Many of us work hard and do our best and yet fail to get the income, relationships or life we "deserve." Over the years however, I've gradually come to think Jim was right. I've often written that "reality never lies." Our income always reflects the long-term results of our skills, our efforts and the market's assessment of the value we contribute. Personally, I'm not a sports fan and I think the salaries of today's super-stars are outrageous. But, given their remarkable skills, their dedication, and the market's willingness to pay, reality says playing sports can be an incredibly valuable activity! Reality never lies. Your income, relationships and circumstances always reflect the decisions you've made and the actions you've taken in the past. Reality is a mirror of who we are and how we've lived our lives.
Another truth is that "we become what we think about all day long." Yes, our lives are influenced by circumstances beyond our control, but our results are influenced far more by our thoughts, our attitudes and our actions, things over which we have almost total control. Your life is literally created with your head, your heart and your hands!If we choose to associate with people who are going nowhere, our chances for unusual success are reduced. If we choose education over television, our chances of success improve. If we think about opportunity, our chances of finding it are much greater than if we focus on limitations and unfairness. We become what we think about. Over time, we create our world with the thoughts we think.
Recently, I attended a seminar on ethics and cultural diversity. Before it started, at the coffee station, I heard one person dismiss the event with the comment, "It's ethics, so close your eyes, sit still and wait for it to end." What a terrible expectation! And, sadly, what a prediction for the day she would have. I intentionally chose to anticipate stimulating ideas, good debate, connecting with friends, and a good lunch. She and I attended the same seminar...or did we? At the end of the day, I would guess our results were very different.In the months ahead, the news media will talk about economic turmoil and how "bad" things are, and you can focus on that if you wish but I don't recommend it. What's the point?
Instead, renew your commitment to the life you want! Decide how you will live, focus on it, and make it happen! This is the time to invest in a shelf of books to inspire and educate yourself in 2009. Now is the time to improve your skills, expand your network, and transform your health. You are in charge of these things! Take action. Why wait? And for goodness sake, why not?Invest in yourself. Surround yourself with beauty and inspiration. Get around great ideas, ambitious people, and unique opportunities. Attend the seminars, read the books, take the classes, listen to audio programs. This is your life! In the long run, we all get the life we create for ourselves. It's not easy and life isn't fair, but our thoughts, our attitudes and our actions influence our results to a remarkable degree. Go get (create) the life you deserve!
Another truth is that "we become what we think about all day long." Yes, our lives are influenced by circumstances beyond our control, but our results are influenced far more by our thoughts, our attitudes and our actions, things over which we have almost total control. Your life is literally created with your head, your heart and your hands!If we choose to associate with people who are going nowhere, our chances for unusual success are reduced. If we choose education over television, our chances of success improve. If we think about opportunity, our chances of finding it are much greater than if we focus on limitations and unfairness. We become what we think about. Over time, we create our world with the thoughts we think.
Recently, I attended a seminar on ethics and cultural diversity. Before it started, at the coffee station, I heard one person dismiss the event with the comment, "It's ethics, so close your eyes, sit still and wait for it to end." What a terrible expectation! And, sadly, what a prediction for the day she would have. I intentionally chose to anticipate stimulating ideas, good debate, connecting with friends, and a good lunch. She and I attended the same seminar...or did we? At the end of the day, I would guess our results were very different.In the months ahead, the news media will talk about economic turmoil and how "bad" things are, and you can focus on that if you wish but I don't recommend it. What's the point?
Instead, renew your commitment to the life you want! Decide how you will live, focus on it, and make it happen! This is the time to invest in a shelf of books to inspire and educate yourself in 2009. Now is the time to improve your skills, expand your network, and transform your health. You are in charge of these things! Take action. Why wait? And for goodness sake, why not?Invest in yourself. Surround yourself with beauty and inspiration. Get around great ideas, ambitious people, and unique opportunities. Attend the seminars, read the books, take the classes, listen to audio programs. This is your life! In the long run, we all get the life we create for ourselves. It's not easy and life isn't fair, but our thoughts, our attitudes and our actions influence our results to a remarkable degree. Go get (create) the life you deserve!
Friday, November 14, 2008
HEAD OR TAILS? TURNING LOSS INTO GAIN
Why did we lose this account? Why did we win this account?
It's like looking at two different sides of the same coin. It doesn't matter what end you happen to be gazing at, you're still holding a coin that has monetary value.
But right now, that coin isn't adding up to the right amount. In two separate Miller Heiman bi-weekly polls, we've found a disconnect in how sales professionals are viewing their customer's purchasing behavior:
Miller Heiman Polls Question Majority Response
Poll 1 Why we lost Price 54%
Poll 2 Why we won Relationship 40%
More than half of sales professionals polled believe they lost because of a customer's issue with the price. On the other hand, they're also convinced that when they win, it's because customers appreciate the established relationship. The answer to the two questions should be the same. If a sales professional lost because of price, they should also have won because of price. If they are reporting they won because of the relationship, it stands to reason that the relationships in other accounts were not cultivated well enough to warrant a win.
"Were it true that everyone bought based on the lowest price, no organization would need a sales force," said Bob Miller, founder of Miller Heiman. Furthermore, the results of the 2008 Miller Heiman Sales Best Practices Study indicated that only 26 percent of respondents indicated they get feedback from customers on their proposals. This statistic reflects an opportunity for many organizations to look at the hard facts of why they're winning and why they're losing.
Whatever side of the coin you gaze at, the truth is: you've got money in your hand! And the one way to reap the value is by performing win/loss reviews on your sales force's accounts.
You may not relish the idea of reconnecting with individuals who decided not to close a sale with you. However, by remaining disciplined and asking the tough questions you need to ask, you can glean important information with which to construct a list of dos or don'ts for future sales. Performing win/loss reviews call attention to the details of a lost sale that led to its failure. They also shed light to the sales practices that helped secure wins. By collecting this information, you can begin to understand what best practices to leverage within the sales force, and avoid those actions that turn customers away.
Win/loss reviews are a cost-effective way to fuel sales practices when times are tough. But the key to coaxing the most return from a deal review is turning your findings into action. Much like holding a coin in your pocket, it isn't good for much until you spend it. Simply having the knowledge is not enough to make it valuable, you must convert it to something that performs for you.
You've got your coin, now put it to good use!
It's like looking at two different sides of the same coin. It doesn't matter what end you happen to be gazing at, you're still holding a coin that has monetary value.
But right now, that coin isn't adding up to the right amount. In two separate Miller Heiman bi-weekly polls, we've found a disconnect in how sales professionals are viewing their customer's purchasing behavior:
Miller Heiman Polls Question Majority Response
Poll 1 Why we lost Price 54%
Poll 2 Why we won Relationship 40%
More than half of sales professionals polled believe they lost because of a customer's issue with the price. On the other hand, they're also convinced that when they win, it's because customers appreciate the established relationship. The answer to the two questions should be the same. If a sales professional lost because of price, they should also have won because of price. If they are reporting they won because of the relationship, it stands to reason that the relationships in other accounts were not cultivated well enough to warrant a win.
"Were it true that everyone bought based on the lowest price, no organization would need a sales force," said Bob Miller, founder of Miller Heiman. Furthermore, the results of the 2008 Miller Heiman Sales Best Practices Study indicated that only 26 percent of respondents indicated they get feedback from customers on their proposals. This statistic reflects an opportunity for many organizations to look at the hard facts of why they're winning and why they're losing.
Whatever side of the coin you gaze at, the truth is: you've got money in your hand! And the one way to reap the value is by performing win/loss reviews on your sales force's accounts.
You may not relish the idea of reconnecting with individuals who decided not to close a sale with you. However, by remaining disciplined and asking the tough questions you need to ask, you can glean important information with which to construct a list of dos or don'ts for future sales. Performing win/loss reviews call attention to the details of a lost sale that led to its failure. They also shed light to the sales practices that helped secure wins. By collecting this information, you can begin to understand what best practices to leverage within the sales force, and avoid those actions that turn customers away.
Win/loss reviews are a cost-effective way to fuel sales practices when times are tough. But the key to coaxing the most return from a deal review is turning your findings into action. Much like holding a coin in your pocket, it isn't good for much until you spend it. Simply having the knowledge is not enough to make it valuable, you must convert it to something that performs for you.
You've got your coin, now put it to good use!
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
THE MICROWAVE IS SLOW
Moments, life is full of moments. If not for moments, time wouldn't exist. It takes a day's full of moments to deem it a day. And it's the quality of those moments that determines success. When we focus too much of our time on the "faster" we are at risk of "missing out". The old adage "you never hear the business man say before his death, 'I wish I would have spent more time in the office". We as a society must, and I mean must slow down! Now, I'm not speaking of the business world, I of all people understand the need to be current and up to speed, but we MUST not let the desire for speed seep into our personal lives. If the "need for speed" finds its way into your personal relationships, the end result will be relationships based on convenience, not substance. This includes all relationships, marriage, father, mother, sister, brother, daughter, son, friend, neighbor, employee, employer, co-worker, etc.
I have discovered some life principles that have allowed me to "savor" the moments in my life; I would like to share them with you in the next few paragraphs. I trust that as you ponder these principles, you will bring to mind the ones who are closest to you and re-discover the blessings you have been given.
Principle #1 - Perspective
Perspective is the tool that regulates the amount of sorrow or joy one feels. When we maintain a healthy perspective on life, we avoid the dramatic swings of emotions. The key to using perspective with your moments is to consider condition of those around you. Regardless of the moment, whether joyful or heart wrenching you have it pretty good. I know, hearing this in the midst of a turmoil filled circumstance is the last thing you want to listen to. It was through maintaining a healthy perspective in my most turmoil filled circumstance that I was and am able to overcome seemingly impossible odds. The tools of perspective maintenance are numerous and relative to the individual. You know your circumstance, you understand your plight, and I believe that you are capable of determining your perspective.
Principle #2 - Purpose
Purpose is the fuel for all action. Why do you do what you do? This is the most fundamental question we can ask of ourselves. Why do you coach your child's little league team? Why do you buy Christmas gifts for your spouse? Why do you commute to your office every day? What's your purpose? Maintaining a healthy purpose will assist you in savoring the moments that accomplish the purpose.
Principle #3 - Preparation
How does preparation fit into moment savoring? Great question, here's what I've learned. If we don't prepare our minds on a consistent basis to look for moments we miss them. When we daily prepare our minds to notice these precious moments we are more apt to take it all in. Take for example, when we attend a professional sporting event. Most of us, anticipate the events of that day, the tailgating, hot dogs, beer, chips, dip, nachos, cheering the wave, etc. We spend ample time preparing our minds and setting expectations. Well, why not translate that preparation to our daily lives. When you wake in the morning, prepare your mind for the experiences that follow. Keep your mind alert to the "great moments". As you commute home, prepare your mind for the greeting or welcome. Take special notice of your children's' facial expression as they see you. Just like anything in life, preparation is key to success. Prepare to savor the moments.
So, the days that followed my microwave experience were full of introspective thought. Thoughts of all the moments that I have let pass me by. Moments of Childhood, Fatherhood, Marriage, Family, Career, Friendship, Hardships, Joy, Happiness, and the list goes on and on. Like I mentioned earlier, life is full of moments. It's what we do these moments that provides us with fulfillment or discontentment. What moments are you letting pass by? Are you focusing too much of your attention on the speed of life instead of the value of life? My only advice to now is to take a breath, look around you and let the moment sink in. Wherever you are, the office, coffee shop, airport, home, ferry, train or plane, look around and let the moment sink in. What has brought you there? Look around and take notice of those around you. Consider their moments, their life stories and experiences. Let the moment sink in, take inventory and appreciate it. Savor all that you have been given. For you never know when the next moment will be your last.
I have discovered some life principles that have allowed me to "savor" the moments in my life; I would like to share them with you in the next few paragraphs. I trust that as you ponder these principles, you will bring to mind the ones who are closest to you and re-discover the blessings you have been given.
Principle #1 - Perspective
Perspective is the tool that regulates the amount of sorrow or joy one feels. When we maintain a healthy perspective on life, we avoid the dramatic swings of emotions. The key to using perspective with your moments is to consider condition of those around you. Regardless of the moment, whether joyful or heart wrenching you have it pretty good. I know, hearing this in the midst of a turmoil filled circumstance is the last thing you want to listen to. It was through maintaining a healthy perspective in my most turmoil filled circumstance that I was and am able to overcome seemingly impossible odds. The tools of perspective maintenance are numerous and relative to the individual. You know your circumstance, you understand your plight, and I believe that you are capable of determining your perspective.
Principle #2 - Purpose
Purpose is the fuel for all action. Why do you do what you do? This is the most fundamental question we can ask of ourselves. Why do you coach your child's little league team? Why do you buy Christmas gifts for your spouse? Why do you commute to your office every day? What's your purpose? Maintaining a healthy purpose will assist you in savoring the moments that accomplish the purpose.
Principle #3 - Preparation
How does preparation fit into moment savoring? Great question, here's what I've learned. If we don't prepare our minds on a consistent basis to look for moments we miss them. When we daily prepare our minds to notice these precious moments we are more apt to take it all in. Take for example, when we attend a professional sporting event. Most of us, anticipate the events of that day, the tailgating, hot dogs, beer, chips, dip, nachos, cheering the wave, etc. We spend ample time preparing our minds and setting expectations. Well, why not translate that preparation to our daily lives. When you wake in the morning, prepare your mind for the experiences that follow. Keep your mind alert to the "great moments". As you commute home, prepare your mind for the greeting or welcome. Take special notice of your children's' facial expression as they see you. Just like anything in life, preparation is key to success. Prepare to savor the moments.
So, the days that followed my microwave experience were full of introspective thought. Thoughts of all the moments that I have let pass me by. Moments of Childhood, Fatherhood, Marriage, Family, Career, Friendship, Hardships, Joy, Happiness, and the list goes on and on. Like I mentioned earlier, life is full of moments. It's what we do these moments that provides us with fulfillment or discontentment. What moments are you letting pass by? Are you focusing too much of your attention on the speed of life instead of the value of life? My only advice to now is to take a breath, look around you and let the moment sink in. Wherever you are, the office, coffee shop, airport, home, ferry, train or plane, look around and let the moment sink in. What has brought you there? Look around and take notice of those around you. Consider their moments, their life stories and experiences. Let the moment sink in, take inventory and appreciate it. Savor all that you have been given. For you never know when the next moment will be your last.
Monday, November 10, 2008
YOUR DATE WITH DESTINY
Destiny. What a powerful word. And the great thing about it? Everyone has one! You have a destiny! Another great thing about destiny? We have a significant role in shaping our own destiny! In essence, you can choose your date with destiny – powerful!
Your destiny is the dream that lies within you of your desired and preferred future. And the things that we choose each day are what lead us to that destiny: Our actions, our words, our attitudes, and our relationships. They all add up to develop and shape that date on which we will reach our destiny.
Here are some thoughts to think about as you work on shaping your Date with Destiny:
The Mental Question: Do you believe that you can achieve a life of abundance?
The frank truth is that many people simply do not believe that they can achieve what lies in their heart. Success is for someone else, a better person, or a smarter person. This is not true and is perhaps the greatest obstacle we face on the journey to our destiny. If we are to achieve the abundance in life we must first believe we can, or face our own continual self-sabotage of what a college professor of mine called “stinkin’-thinkin.’”
Here is the truth:
It doesn’t matter what your intelligence is.
It doesn’t matter what your current resources are.
It doesn’t matter what you currently earn.
It doesn’t matter what family you came from.
Nothing in your current circumstances matter in whether or not you can achieve your destiny! Nothing! Now, your current state may make it a longer or harder journey than someone else, but the possibility is always there no matter what your current circumstances are.
And that is the message we need to continually tell ourselves. “I can do it.” Not “I can’t do it.” Clear vision. Do you have one of your destiny? Here are some questions to determine whether or not your vision is clear.
Can you describe it in intricate detail?
Can you “see” it?
Can you “feel” it?Can you “hear” it?
Here are a couple of illustrations.
Perhaps you came from a dysfunctional family and your dream is to have great moments with your family. Let’s start with a Thanksgiving meal.
Can you see each person there?
What are they wearing?
Are they smiling?
What is the conversation?
Can you hear the laughter?
Can you experience the joy?
Can you smell the turkey?
Can you see people hugging each other and saying “This was wonderful,” as they leave?
Another scenario: Your company.
Can you see the large building you are in?
Can you see the workers?
Can you feel the positive attitude they have as they carry out their work?
Can you experience the excitement as you get the quarterly results?
Can you see yourself handing out healthy bonuses that bring pleasant surprises to your employees?
This is where it begins. A clear vision of your destiny. Consider your resources. Are you aware of the resources you will need in order to set your date with destiny? Do you know how you will go about getting them?
What are your natural gifts and talents that you have? How can you best utilize them in achieving your destiny?
What are your current level of resources?
Money?
Time?
Emotional health?
Help from others such as friends, family, employees or volunteers?What will be your needed future level of resources? And have you developed a plan to achieve this level?
The last thing I would encourage you to do is fix a date in the future that you believe you could believe you will be living your destiny by. A real date. What this enables you to do is then begin to work backwards in setting goals to move you along the way, proving you with future points to strive for and evaluation point to reflect upon.
Here are the points again:
Answer the mental question: Do I really believe?
Develop a clear vision.
Consider the resources needed.
Set a date with destiny.
Develop a plan to get there.
Your destiny is the dream that lies within you of your desired and preferred future. And the things that we choose each day are what lead us to that destiny: Our actions, our words, our attitudes, and our relationships. They all add up to develop and shape that date on which we will reach our destiny.
Here are some thoughts to think about as you work on shaping your Date with Destiny:
The Mental Question: Do you believe that you can achieve a life of abundance?
The frank truth is that many people simply do not believe that they can achieve what lies in their heart. Success is for someone else, a better person, or a smarter person. This is not true and is perhaps the greatest obstacle we face on the journey to our destiny. If we are to achieve the abundance in life we must first believe we can, or face our own continual self-sabotage of what a college professor of mine called “stinkin’-thinkin.’”
Here is the truth:
It doesn’t matter what your intelligence is.
It doesn’t matter what your current resources are.
It doesn’t matter what you currently earn.
It doesn’t matter what family you came from.
Nothing in your current circumstances matter in whether or not you can achieve your destiny! Nothing! Now, your current state may make it a longer or harder journey than someone else, but the possibility is always there no matter what your current circumstances are.
And that is the message we need to continually tell ourselves. “I can do it.” Not “I can’t do it.” Clear vision. Do you have one of your destiny? Here are some questions to determine whether or not your vision is clear.
Can you describe it in intricate detail?
Can you “see” it?
Can you “feel” it?Can you “hear” it?
Here are a couple of illustrations.
Perhaps you came from a dysfunctional family and your dream is to have great moments with your family. Let’s start with a Thanksgiving meal.
Can you see each person there?
What are they wearing?
Are they smiling?
What is the conversation?
Can you hear the laughter?
Can you experience the joy?
Can you smell the turkey?
Can you see people hugging each other and saying “This was wonderful,” as they leave?
Another scenario: Your company.
Can you see the large building you are in?
Can you see the workers?
Can you feel the positive attitude they have as they carry out their work?
Can you experience the excitement as you get the quarterly results?
Can you see yourself handing out healthy bonuses that bring pleasant surprises to your employees?
This is where it begins. A clear vision of your destiny. Consider your resources. Are you aware of the resources you will need in order to set your date with destiny? Do you know how you will go about getting them?
What are your natural gifts and talents that you have? How can you best utilize them in achieving your destiny?
What are your current level of resources?
Money?
Time?
Emotional health?
Help from others such as friends, family, employees or volunteers?What will be your needed future level of resources? And have you developed a plan to achieve this level?
The last thing I would encourage you to do is fix a date in the future that you believe you could believe you will be living your destiny by. A real date. What this enables you to do is then begin to work backwards in setting goals to move you along the way, proving you with future points to strive for and evaluation point to reflect upon.
Here are the points again:
Answer the mental question: Do I really believe?
Develop a clear vision.
Consider the resources needed.
Set a date with destiny.
Develop a plan to get there.
Friday, November 7, 2008
THE PRIMARY KEY TO ALL PERSONAL SUCCESS
I owe EVERYTHING I have to one very important skill. If it weren't for this one skill, I would not be able to help anyone discover the tremendous Power that lies within them, nor would I have been able to reach a level of success where I enjoy as much happiness and joy as I do today. When I was in high-school, I was a very insecure kid - full of self-doubts, and scared out of my wits to reach out and make friends. In my mind, I was a nobody, and before I would be interesting enough for people to accept me, I had to become more than I was. Because of that belief, I started reading self-help books and anything I could find on personal relationships. Luckily, I stumbled on a book that opened my mind to a concept I'd never considered. It was called "The Greatest Salesman in the World" and was written by Og Mandino. In the preface of the book, the author talked about some of the 1000s of letters from readers telling about how the book helped them find their niche in life and reach personal success in areas that seemed to have nothing at all to do with sales. In some cases, the book literally saved their lives. At that time of my life, I didn't want anything to do with selling anything, so this was a radical concept to me - that selling was in some way related to personal success. Very quickly, I discovered the truth of it, as every situation in life requires that you 'sell' an idea to someone. When you want to make friends, you have to 'sell' yourself as someone who is enjoyable to spend time with. The same is true when you want to ask someone out on a date. When you go in for a job interview, you have to 'sell' yourself as the best choice for the position. When you counseling a friend, you're 'selling' them on taking your suggestions and acting on them. When you negotiate to buy a car or house, you're 'selling' the seller on the idea of lowering the price. And if you're the one selling a car or house, you're very definitely selling. Selling the idea that what you have is worth at least as much as you're asking for it. And if you have a business, your ability to sell will spell either success or failure for that business. In short, sales skills are the most important key to success in all areas of life.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
OBAMA: THE CHALLENGE OF LEADERSHIP
What would I say if given just one more chance to give a short speech that would challenge people to step forward and lead? Here it is:
The topic of leadership has been and continues to be one of the most vital topics in human history. From ancient civilizations to modern day multi-national corporations, men and women of passion, fervor and zeal have sought to discover the secrets of moving others beyond the gray of their mundane reality to the rich array of colors that embody the palate of the extraordinary life.
Every organization or collection of people, from large to small, requires ardent and skilled leaders. It has been said that everything rises and falls on leadership, and it is true. Every group – families, cities, churches, associations and yes, even nations – fulfills its purposes and potential based on the leadership it is shown.
As leaders we are given the charge, the responsibility, and the privilege to see grand visions, to dream lofty dreams, to forge new ground, and to challenge and encourage those who would follow our leadership to ascend the heights with us. We beckon them to come. We implore them. All for their own good. This is to lead them toward their possibilities.
Be assured that there will be a leader of every group. There will be those who influence others, even if you don’t. There may even be unscrupulous people who use their abilities to lead others astray. The quote “All it takes for evil to prevail is for the good man to do nothing,” remains true today, as it has through the annals of time. This is the compelling motive for you to rise up and lead the way for others.
Our families depend on it.
Our community groups depend on it.
Our nations depend on it.
People will follow you for two reasons:
-They follow you because of your character, for who you are.
-They also follow you for your skills, for what you can do. Make it your every effort to impart skillful and honorable leadership for them that would look to you for your wisdom, your guidance and your belief in the promise of the human spirit.
Someone will lead. Will it be you? If not you, then who will lead? If you will not lead now, then when?
Today, more than ever, you are needed. Your strong character is needed. Your finely honed skills are needed. I know you will rise to the challenge.
Lead boldly. Lead with faith. Lead others to the pinnacle of the human existence. This is the highest calling and the reward is of the utmost kind.
You can also become an OBAMA!
The topic of leadership has been and continues to be one of the most vital topics in human history. From ancient civilizations to modern day multi-national corporations, men and women of passion, fervor and zeal have sought to discover the secrets of moving others beyond the gray of their mundane reality to the rich array of colors that embody the palate of the extraordinary life.
Every organization or collection of people, from large to small, requires ardent and skilled leaders. It has been said that everything rises and falls on leadership, and it is true. Every group – families, cities, churches, associations and yes, even nations – fulfills its purposes and potential based on the leadership it is shown.
As leaders we are given the charge, the responsibility, and the privilege to see grand visions, to dream lofty dreams, to forge new ground, and to challenge and encourage those who would follow our leadership to ascend the heights with us. We beckon them to come. We implore them. All for their own good. This is to lead them toward their possibilities.
Be assured that there will be a leader of every group. There will be those who influence others, even if you don’t. There may even be unscrupulous people who use their abilities to lead others astray. The quote “All it takes for evil to prevail is for the good man to do nothing,” remains true today, as it has through the annals of time. This is the compelling motive for you to rise up and lead the way for others.
Our families depend on it.
Our community groups depend on it.
Our nations depend on it.
People will follow you for two reasons:
-They follow you because of your character, for who you are.
-They also follow you for your skills, for what you can do. Make it your every effort to impart skillful and honorable leadership for them that would look to you for your wisdom, your guidance and your belief in the promise of the human spirit.
Someone will lead. Will it be you? If not you, then who will lead? If you will not lead now, then when?
Today, more than ever, you are needed. Your strong character is needed. Your finely honed skills are needed. I know you will rise to the challenge.
Lead boldly. Lead with faith. Lead others to the pinnacle of the human existence. This is the highest calling and the reward is of the utmost kind.
You can also become an OBAMA!
Monday, November 3, 2008
MAGIC 8-BALL
Do you remember that little toy many of us had when we were little that supposedly “answered” questions? It was a black eight ball like one you would play pool with that had a window in it that, when turned upside down, would display a floating unit inside with pre-scripted answers to your questions. What is funny about this is that there was a remote chance that the answers could be reasonably close to a possible answer!
This got me to thinking: Are there a set group of answers you could find most of the answers to life’s situations in? I think we could come close, so I sat down and thought about all of the issues that I deal with in people’s lives and realized that most answers do come from the same pool of answers.
Why is this? Because there is nothing new under the sun and the problems of the human existence tend to repeat themselves.
So here are MY answers. See if one of them won’t do the trick for your question, problem, or situation.
You Need Clearer Vision. Sometimes the problem lies in the fact that our vision isn’t clear enough. We “kind of” know where we are going and that means we “kind of” get there! By getting our vision clearer, we are able to refine our path, which brings us the results we are looking for on our journey.
Question: Do you need to clear up your vision before you move on?
Stop Whining – Life Isn’t Fair. Yes, some people have it better than others. Sometimes that is just the way it is. But to get our minds on that fact is useless, and to constantly lament the fact that an office mate “gets all the breaks” is simply whining. It is time to get over it and quit focusing in on your differences and start focusing in on creating the life that you want, because you can live the life you dream of if you redirect your whining energy into success energy!
Question: Are you spending more energy whining or working on your success plan?
Persevere and Give It Time. Sometimes it is hard, that is true. Sometimes we just need to go one more day. I have had this happen in my life many times. There have been times in my life when my whole goal was to get through another week. Plug away, push through, and persevere. Give it time and you will find yourself making ground toward your desired destination.
Question: Is this a time when you simply need to keep persevering and giving your situation time to work itself out?
Increase Your Skills. There are times we don’t get what we want because we just don’t have the skills. That is the bad news. The good news is that we can always increase our skills! Sometimes we find ourselves in a spot where the proper thing to do is to readdress our skill level so the next time we take a stab at it we can succeed because of our increased skill level.
Question: Is it time to refocus on increasing your skills?
Forgive Them and Move On. People will burn you. I have had countless people burn me in my life. It happens. Sometimes we even burn other people, even when we aren’t trying to. The key to success is to forgive them and move on. Unforgiveness will root you in your undesired past through your memory and that is not where you want to live the rest of your life! When you forgive those who burn you, you set yourself free.
Question: Whom do you need to forgive?
Time for An Attitude Adjustment! It has been said that “Your attitude determines your altitude” and it is true! Sometimes we do not achieve what we want to because our attitude stinks. And a stinky attitude affects a lot of what happens to us including how others treat us. Sometimes we have to take a long look in the mirror and realize that we need to see a change in our attitude.
Question: Is your attitude the element that is holding you back?
When all else is said and done, at least you have a great family. Many times we get caught up in things that just really don’t matter. Much of what we consider to be “so important” just isn’t. The most important thing we can do is lead a healthy family life and raise our children to become great people themselves! If you can rest in this, my friend, you can truly rest.
Question: Are you valuing your family as you should?
You need to take a break and gets some rest. All work and no play makes Johnny and Suzie a dull boy and girl! Sometimes when I am dealing with people and helping them to sort things out, I simply tell them to walk away for a while. They need a break. They need a rest. Time away will make them stronger for the battle when they re-enter the arena.
Question: Is it time for you to take a break?
What do you think? Is there an answer for you in the above statements? I think if we are honest with ourselves, almost all of life’s situations could be answered by one of the above! So, the next time you need a little advice, read the article again and see if you don’t find the answer!
This got me to thinking: Are there a set group of answers you could find most of the answers to life’s situations in? I think we could come close, so I sat down and thought about all of the issues that I deal with in people’s lives and realized that most answers do come from the same pool of answers.
Why is this? Because there is nothing new under the sun and the problems of the human existence tend to repeat themselves.
So here are MY answers. See if one of them won’t do the trick for your question, problem, or situation.
You Need Clearer Vision. Sometimes the problem lies in the fact that our vision isn’t clear enough. We “kind of” know where we are going and that means we “kind of” get there! By getting our vision clearer, we are able to refine our path, which brings us the results we are looking for on our journey.
Question: Do you need to clear up your vision before you move on?
Stop Whining – Life Isn’t Fair. Yes, some people have it better than others. Sometimes that is just the way it is. But to get our minds on that fact is useless, and to constantly lament the fact that an office mate “gets all the breaks” is simply whining. It is time to get over it and quit focusing in on your differences and start focusing in on creating the life that you want, because you can live the life you dream of if you redirect your whining energy into success energy!
Question: Are you spending more energy whining or working on your success plan?
Persevere and Give It Time. Sometimes it is hard, that is true. Sometimes we just need to go one more day. I have had this happen in my life many times. There have been times in my life when my whole goal was to get through another week. Plug away, push through, and persevere. Give it time and you will find yourself making ground toward your desired destination.
Question: Is this a time when you simply need to keep persevering and giving your situation time to work itself out?
Increase Your Skills. There are times we don’t get what we want because we just don’t have the skills. That is the bad news. The good news is that we can always increase our skills! Sometimes we find ourselves in a spot where the proper thing to do is to readdress our skill level so the next time we take a stab at it we can succeed because of our increased skill level.
Question: Is it time to refocus on increasing your skills?
Forgive Them and Move On. People will burn you. I have had countless people burn me in my life. It happens. Sometimes we even burn other people, even when we aren’t trying to. The key to success is to forgive them and move on. Unforgiveness will root you in your undesired past through your memory and that is not where you want to live the rest of your life! When you forgive those who burn you, you set yourself free.
Question: Whom do you need to forgive?
Time for An Attitude Adjustment! It has been said that “Your attitude determines your altitude” and it is true! Sometimes we do not achieve what we want to because our attitude stinks. And a stinky attitude affects a lot of what happens to us including how others treat us. Sometimes we have to take a long look in the mirror and realize that we need to see a change in our attitude.
Question: Is your attitude the element that is holding you back?
When all else is said and done, at least you have a great family. Many times we get caught up in things that just really don’t matter. Much of what we consider to be “so important” just isn’t. The most important thing we can do is lead a healthy family life and raise our children to become great people themselves! If you can rest in this, my friend, you can truly rest.
Question: Are you valuing your family as you should?
You need to take a break and gets some rest. All work and no play makes Johnny and Suzie a dull boy and girl! Sometimes when I am dealing with people and helping them to sort things out, I simply tell them to walk away for a while. They need a break. They need a rest. Time away will make them stronger for the battle when they re-enter the arena.
Question: Is it time for you to take a break?
What do you think? Is there an answer for you in the above statements? I think if we are honest with ourselves, almost all of life’s situations could be answered by one of the above! So, the next time you need a little advice, read the article again and see if you don’t find the answer!
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